Development Challenges

Topics:

• Freedom to Fly
• Fathers Involvment Is Important!
• Typical Tween Development
  
  
  

  Freedom to Fly

  Early adolescence is a time when youth want more freedom to “spread their wings.” As tweens learn the process of managing freedom, parents need to take the time and energy needed to monitor their progress. Adolescents should earn their right to more freedom. With freedom comes the responsibility to endure the consequences of choices. As tweens demonstrate responsibility at one level of freedom, parents can help them move to the next level by giving a little more freedom. For example, before your adolescent can stay home alone during the weekend, you may want to have some practice runs during the week. If your adolescent can handle shorter periods of time, such as one evening alone, then he or she may be ready to move to the next level. Permissive parenting (little control) has been found to be associated with behavior problems. Studies have shown that it is better to give too little freedom than too much. Remember that it is the parent’s responsibility to decide when the adolescent is ready to move to the next step, and to define that next step. Even though they can handle more responsibility than younger children, tweens still need some boundaries and limits. It is important that they know exactly what is expected of them Most teens will try to stretch your limits to the max. When you fail to monitor, things can get out of hand quickly. Good parenting of tweens is hard work but the outcomes are well worth the effort.

  
  

  Fathers Involvment Is Important!

  Fathers contribute to the development of their children in a number of very important ways. They help their children develop differently than mothers do. For instance, fathers are more likely to play with their children, while mothers tend to spend more time in routine caregiving. Fathers also play more physically active games with their children than mothers do. Youth ages 10 to 15 need their fathers just as much as they did when they were younger. Here are three ways that fathers can be involved in their youth’s lives. 1. Fathers can spend time one on one with their youth doing something fun such as playing ball or going fishing. During this activity, fathers can take time to find out what is going on in their youth’s lives and talk with them about any issues they are facing. 2. Fathers can involve their youth in projects they are working on around the house. In this way, fathers are teaching their youth the importance of asking for help, giving help, and being responsible. 3. Fathers can be supportive of their youth’s engagement in extracurricular activities by being a volunteer and a spectator. Fathers who live apart from their youth are no less needed in their youth’s lives, and there are things he can do to stay involved. For example, fathers can have their youth check in with them every day, by either phone or email. The father and the youth can decide on a book to read while they are apart and then spend time talking about the book when they get together. Having an involved father makes a big difference in a youth’s life. A father’s involvement will strengthen a youth’s social, mental, and academic development. Research has demonstrated that youth with involved fathers score higher on cognitive tests, do better in school, and are more likely to graduate high school and go on to vocational school or college. Youth with involved fathers are also less likely to have problems with the law or teenage violence. Quality, not quantity, of father involvement is what is important for a youth’s development, but spending time together is an important part of building the relationship between a father and his children, no matter what the children’s age. Fathers contribute greatly to their youth’s well-being. Having an involved father can be a great help as a youth begins to grow from child to young adult.

  
  

  Typical Tween Development

  Physical development Marked by a growth spurt which occurs across a wide range of ages, with females maturing before males. (Rapid physical changes are often a source of embarrassment for young teens.) Most females reach maximum height by age 14, most males by age 16; males gain muscle, females gain fat. Both sexes are still developing bone mass. Emotional development During puberty, changes in hormones and changes in thinking contribute to mood swings. Begin to test value. (Justice and equality become regarded as important issues.) Searching for independence and identity, usually achieved around age 16. Younger teens have difficulty with compromise. Intellectual development Will intensely explore subjects of interest. Often reject solutions offered by adults in favor of finding their own solutions. Mastering abstract thinking. Social development Joining clubs and groups becomes very important around age 9-10. Because of their physical and mental growth, adolescents are no longer treated like children. Beginning of serious interest in and interactions with teens of the opposite sex. Seeking more independence.

Return to the Table of Contents or continue to Introduction and credits, Peer Challenges, Communication Challenges, The Challenge of Teaching Tweens Needed Survival Skills, Health Challenges, Current Challenges, or Responsibility Challenges.